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Thursday, August 19, 2004
Hang-up

Nagtataka lang ako. Ang dami-dami kong kilalang tao na hanggang ngayon, may hang-up pa rin sa mga high school flame nila. Hindi ko sinasabing in-lab pa rin sila ha, pero sinasabi ko lang, meron pa silang hang-up. Para bang, kahit anim na taon (at maraming tao) na yung nakalipas, hindi pa rin nila makalimutan. O ayaw nilang kalimutan?

Meron diyang pa-text-text pa rin, at meron namang takot na takot mag-text. Merong dinadaan na lang sa Friendster, sa email, o 'di kaya sa Yahoo! Groups na la lang. Merong iba naman, wala na ngang communication, 'di naman matigil sa kadadaldal tungkol sa kanya. Yung iba nga, ang kapal ng mukha at sa volleyball tournament pa dinadaan. Iniisip ko tuloy, bakit, pagkalipas ng anim na taon, importante pa rin sila.

Naalala ko tuloy, kasama ko si Jem Bunao, nakaupo kami sa may front lobby, at pinag-uusapan namin yung isang crush ko noong panahon na yun. Binigyan niya ako ng pep talk, at sinabi sa akin na 'pag dumaan na yung crush ko, kausapin ko raw. At maya-maya nga lang, eto na nga yung crush ko, galing 'atang Bio o Chem lab, dala-dala yung lab gown niya.

At sa dahan-dahan niyang paglapit, inilabas ko na ang lahat ng tapang na tinatago sa dibdib ko at nagbigay ng isang makabagbag-damdaming... "Hi!"

Nagbigay naman siya ng maliit na ngiti at mas maliit na kaway, at habang pinapanood namin siyang maglakad ng palayo, hiniritan na lang ako ni Jem ng, "O, ginawa mo nga yung sinabi ko, haba ng usapan niyo ah, parang nag-bonding nga kayo ah."

Kaya nga naisip ko, kaya meron pa ring hang-up yung ibang tao ngayon, dahil na rin siguro sa panghihinayang. Bakit nga ba, naisip nila, nakilala ko siya noong 15 pa lang ako (at tatanga-tanga pa) at hindi ngayong 23 na (tatanga-tanga pa rin, pero hindi na masyadong halata)? Yun nga ba ang dahilan?

Eh ako ba, meron pang hang-up?

Pucha, wala na noh.

At kung meron man, hinding-hindi ko aaminin. Mamaya binabasa pala ng boyfriend niya 'tong blog na 'to eh.



Comments:

medyo natamaan ata ako dun a. hehe.

kaya siguro may hang-ups pa rin ang mga tao dun sa mga taong na inlababu sila dahil parte na ito ng buhay nila noon na sadyang mahirap limutin. at 'di naman dapat talagang kalimutan dahil 'di kumpleto ang high school experience nila kung wala iyon.
 

closure:

1. The act of closing or the state of being closed: closure of an incision.
2. A bringing to an end; a conclusion:

now let me clear my throat a little....
 

hehe actually, naisip ko lang i-post 'to dahil kakapanood ko lang ng palabas na Ed, na nagre-revolve sa hang-ups ng isang lalake tungkol sa high school life niya ang mga kwento. astig yung show, nakakatawa, pero minsan mahirap panoorin kasi, It hits a little too close to home.
 

special mention! w00t!
*

retrospection lang yan. a lot of things have happened, most of them things you'd like to do differently. you're thinking, "sana nalaman ko na ganito yung mangyayari a few years ago."

i don't think of them as hangups. for me, it's like carrying old letters in your wallet, or turning over an egg from time to time, examining the shell. you do it because it is a part of you you can't ignore.

*
naalala ko tuloy ulet yung pep talk na yun. go jae!
 

jem,

you carry old letters in your wallet? what are you, a 15-year-old girl? hahahaha, just kidding.
 

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Hehe.. Si JAm, na-censor..

Closure.. May mga tao na umiiwas lang talaga sa closure.. Baka maging parang sa Matrix yung ending.. Corny..
 

anak ng... anong nangyari sa MGA post ko?

pasensya na po!

sabi ko lang. . .

oist rico! first post a. ang tagal mo ng MIA. eheh. :)
 

hmm. may censorship pala dito. hah... :)
 

hehe sorry jam, di ko sinasadya... tatlong beses kasing lumabas yung comment, so dinelete ko... eh dine-delete mo rin pala. kaya ayun :p
 

oks lang. bagal kasi ng net sa office kaya nagka-multiple posts ako. sorry peeps. . .
 

 

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